drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
