I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
