She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize