I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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