You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
this boner is exhausting
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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