His pubic hair was longer than his dick
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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