That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
