his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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