You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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