You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Randomize
