he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
