just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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