sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
