Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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