Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I think i got beer on your cat.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
