fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
