She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
not ubering you a puppy
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
