You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
