How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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