But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Someone signed my nipple.
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