So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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