HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
