I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
you win again, gameday.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
But break dance skills will only take you so far
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize
