he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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