Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
