Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Every concussion has its silver lining
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
