Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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