Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
