It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
