oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
