So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
