I'm so fucking centered right now
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
