Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Randomize
