he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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