Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
