he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
