You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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