I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
