i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
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