i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
