So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
