What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
