ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
