I'm laying in your front yard are you home
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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