Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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