can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
