I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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