I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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