I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize