yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
