garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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